Steampunk. What’s is all about eh? Blokes in toppers and kilts. Ladies in voluminous dresses and tricorn hats. Everyone running about with goggles and foam ‘space weapons’, the latter looking like they were designed by Isembard Kingdom Brunel. It’s all a bit twee and silly, and it is to Metal what Morris dancing is to – I don’t know – Trident?
Because of this inherent silliness there haven’t been many attempts to bridge the yawning chasm between the genres – if Steampunk can be called such. The odd hat put to a more sinister purpose, perhaps. Aside from that? Imperial Vengeance had a go, but Black Metal doesn’t lend itself to an inherently cheery milieu. What it really needs is something big, loud, utterly ridiculous and sporting a bowler hat. Enter Rapscallion!
Leaping nimbly across the cultural gulf from The Other Side, Rapscallion on this album consists solely of uniband Moog Gravett. By his own account Gravett was raised in the wild by Kraftwerk and named for one of their synthesisers. A mild-mannered software engineer by day, he is also a former chainsaw-wielding werewolf of the Circus of Horrors. The right man, in other words, to forge all that Steampunk creativity into Metal Glory.
For those who don’t know Steampunk, it only has two real stars. One is the pith-helmeted Rasputin of Rap, Professor Elemental. The other is that moustachioed Euronymus of the ukulele, Mr B the Gentleman Rhymer. Naturally they are both from Brighton. Equally naturally Elemental’s finest work is a searingly vicious, wholly unprovoked attack on his only rival.
When not wielding chainsaws, crafting software or (occasionally) recording his parts for Rapscallion, Moog is the creator of Professor Elemental’s videos, and populariser of his most famous works. It is only fitting then that the ever-so-slightly sinister shadow of Professor Elemental looms large across ‘Maximum Splendid’.
A Heavy Metal cover of Elemental’s ‘Cup of Brown Joy’, could have been a bore, but it absolutely isn’t. It’s a whole teapot of unadulterated pleasure. “Heavy Metal!” cries The Great Man “Bang your head to his!” Professor Elemental. Welcome to your milieu.
‘Night Of The Giant Killer Crabs’, the first Metal song dealing with the all-important Crab Threat since ‘Crabulon’ is as much Professor Elemental as Rapscallion. In fact it is a crazily ambitious, very funny ‘War of the World’-style epic, with some fine vocals and compelling acting from The Female Voice Of Reason, Lou Gravett, and a suitably sinister sting in the tail.
The only danger with involving Your Friend The Superstar on an album is that it can become all-encompassing. Imagine having, say, Bruce Dickinson standing around. The temptation to involve him to the extent that your album became The New Bruce Dickinson would be strong indeed. Rapscallion doesn’t cross that line. Still, a re-working of the Professor’s ‘This Is My Horse’ does feel a step too far. If you are going to glut on Professor Elemental then why no ‘Fighting Trousers’? OK it’s been done – But. Really. Badly.
Not that Moog needs the help anyway. ‘Maximum Splendid’ is an excellent hard rock record in its own right, with well written, catchy, songs capturing a mid-1980’s Metal, if somewhat cheerful vibe. He has the voice to carry it all off, at some points showing some real, characterful, range and is no mean guitar player or bassist either.
Varg Vikernes would no doubt scratch his head at lyrics about moustaches and the vital question of which biscuit reigns supreme (it’s the custard cream), but all in all you can imagine Rapscallion going down really well somewhere like Germany without anybody having a single clue what any of the lyrics mean.
Big hit single ‘(You’re Bloody Well Getting) Rock n’Roll (Tonight)’ is an AC/DC-ish rock anthem in the vein of Airbourne, but with better pressed trousers. ‘Call On You’ showcases some awesome riffage from Gravett as well as a cunningly wrought chorus. The whole thing screams an encyclopaedic knowledge of ‘80s metal.
‘Blaggard’ chills out in power-ballad approved fashion. It’s mid-80s Whitesnake but with (deliberately) funny lyrics. ‘Cthulette’ is another toe-tapper, on the theme of the ultimate disaster date. ‘Queen of Treats’ sleazes impressively along before kicking into a heavy-duty chorus. This one’s Manowar, but in biscuit form. ‘Never Love a Man Without a Moustache’ rocks like late-career The Darkness with a touch of The Dandy Warhols. ‘Maketh The Man’ is another power ballad to bring things to a close, showing that Gravett’s album-craft is as sharp as his songwriting.
As a debut album ‘Maximum Splendid’ takes some beating. According to a recent telegram from the man himself, Rapscallion now consists of a full band and is already working on a follow-up EP. It will be interesting to see how involving other musicians affects the sound.
In the meantime, alright, Rapscallion won’t be burning down churches any time soon, but if you want a light-hearted End of Covid bit of fun that also kicks like a top-hatted, space-goggled, Giant Steampunk Crab … then Look. No. Further ….
(8/10 Graham Cushway)
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